Caleb's hermit crabs

A do-over

This morning as I started to get dressed for the day I noticed that my underwear (the ones I was taking off) was wrong-side-out. Which means that I wore them all day yesterday wrong-side-out. Now I know that this shouldn't make a difference. I mean, it's just underwear. And technically it works either way. And it's not like anyone saw it or anything...so it shouldn't matter, right?

Then why do I feel so disconcerted over it? I feel like the whole previous day may have been messed up somehow. Yesterday was actually a pretty normal, low-key Sunday for me. Nothing big. Pretty relaxing, actually. But I wonder how it would have turned out if my underwear had been right-side-out. Would it have made a difference? Would my day have been better? Worse? The same? I can't help but feeling I want a do-over. I want to do yesterday over to see what would have happened. I want to put the whole world on "pause" and then quickly rewind to the part where I put my underwear on (this time right-side-out) and then hit play again.

Can anyone guess which way my underwear is turned today???

Lunch

Because my life is deliriously exciting, I thought you might all like to see what I eat for lunch everyday. Seems I get in a routine of eating one certain thing for lunch and I stick to it for a few years. Then I find something else I like and eat that for a few years. Before I had kids but after college, I remember eating peanut buttter and jelly (had to be peach or apricot jam) everyday for lunch. When I was pregnant with Sam, it was McDonald's cheeseburger and fries. Pregnant with Caleb: ramen noodle soup. Right now (NO, I'm not pregnant), it's a turkey sandwich with mustard and cheese. Sometimes it's provolone, sometimes swiss, this week it's muenster cheese. BUT, it has to be toasted. I put it in my little toaster oven and warm it all up and wait for the cheese to get gooey and bubbly. Ahhhhh, it doesn't get much better than that.
The funny thing about my lunch is that I have to have Lay's potato chips with it, too. I can get by on an off-brand, but it has to be plain potato chips, NO ruffles or ridges! I tend to think that the PORTION of my chips could probably be smaller, but in reality this is what it looks like. I pretty much cover any available space on the plate that is not already taken up by the sandwich.

When you work out 2-3 hours a day, I guess you can do that?!

Please don't put me on hold

Oh my goodness. I just got off the phone with my credit card company. Again. The week before Christmas, someone used our credit card for their own amusement all over Manhattan. Even though our card(s) were still in our wallet(s), somehow someone used it at the Olive Garden, Red Lobster, Hallmark Store, Duane Reade (like Rite Aid) and for thousands of dollars in cash advances. Anyway, it's taken months now for the credit card company to finish their "investigation" and remove the charges from our account. In the interim, they told me to just pay what I actually owe and to ignore the charges and mounting interest/finance charges. The last of the fraudulent charges were removed last week (after MANY calls on my part) but they failed to remove the interest/finance charges and the cash advance transaction fees. Ugh. So I called them today. Again. This time, at least, I have a direct number to the fraud investigation department. That saves a lot of time. Anyway, the call went a little something like this:

***5 min. pause while I listen to Muzak and wait for the next available associate***

Credit card company: Thank you for calling the fraud investigation department. Can I have your 16 digit account number please?

Me: Hi, please don't put me on hold. Whatever you do, I'm begging you, please don't put me on hold.

CCC: I just need your 16 digit account number, ma'am and we can get started.

Me: **sounding even more desperate and somewhat hysterical** I don't mean to sound weird, but seriously, if you put me on hold I might actually go postal or something.

CCC: OK, ma'am, let's get through the 16 digit account number and security questions and I'll do my best to not put you on hold.

**Flashback to 15 min. earlier**

I call the credit card company, after listening to 5 min. of Muzak I talk to a real person and tell him my dilemma of not getting the finance charges credited to my account, etc. He asks what the amounts are, we get into this big complicated discussion that involves a LOT of math and then he tells me to hold on for a moment. He puts me on hold while, I assume, he's calculating all the amounts. I wait and then I hear new Muzak with an intermittent voice telling me that my call is important to them and that I am waiting for the next available associate. But wait, there's more. It says the average wait time right now is TEN minutes. AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH! Why am I even waiting for the next available associate? I already had a guy. We were friends. We were working together! Or wait, maybe not. Maybe he didn't like doing all that math so he decided to ditch me!?

SO, I wait on hold for about ten minutes (while listening to Muzak--it feels more like 10 hours) and try making my lunch at the same time. I can multi-task, right?! And then guess what happens. Oh yes. I get disconnected. AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH! So I call back (thank goodness for that direct line) and wait my turn and get a new associate.

**Fast forward to present**

CCC: OK, ma'am, let's get through the 16 digit account number and security questions and I'll do my best to not put you on hold.

I explain what happened during my previous call and why I sound somewhat hysterical. She apologizes on behalf of the other doofus who was "helping" me--the guy who I thought was my friend--and tells me that she can solve my problem withOUT putting me on hold and that I should see my account credited within the next 1-2 billing cycles.

Me: That's it? I don't need to do anything else?

CCC: I'll take care of everything.

Me: We don't have to do any complicated math? You don't need me to tell you what all the finance charges are?

CCC: No, ma'am, I can do all that on my end. I apologize again for the what happened previously and you have a nice day.

Wow, that was it. I'm still a little skeptical that everything will magically be OK on my next statement, but we'll see. Maybe I won't cancel my account afterall. I was getting REAL close!

All Zumba'd out?

You know how you get certain songs stuck in your head and your brain plays them over and over again until you just about go bonkers? I get that way with Zumba songs. I have to listen to them over and over again anyway...before I ever actually use a song in class, I have to listen to many times to memorize it and memorize the choreography that goes along with it. Luckily, after just listening to it a few times, my brain has it memorized and I can "play" and "re-play" it in my head whenever I want. So I can practice Zumba in my head anytime I want: while driving, grocery shopping, sitting in the pickup line at school, etc. It comes in handy at times and I think it helps me be a better instructor, actually, because I am practicing (in my head) ALL the time.

I do it even in my sleep. Many times I have woken up with a Zumba song in my head and I'll realize that I'm like half-way through the song and was also doing the choreography in my head, in my sleep. Whatever. Practice makes perfect, right? Well, let me tell you, it can become exhausting! The other night, I think I was doing Zumba all night long in my sleep. I was so exhausted when I woke up the next morning. I said as much to Dave and he said, "You're so tired because you were teaching Zumba all night. You were talking in your sleep all night and it was all Zumba". Then I remembered that at one point during the night, I actually sat up in bed and barked out instructions...something like, "two steps right, ARMS UP!" At that point, Dave touched my arm and said, "Are you still teaching?" That shook me out of my dream and I realized that yes, I was still teaching. All night long. In my sleep. I gotta stop doing that!

The worst part of the whole affair is that as my brain is playing these songs over and over...well, let's remember they're almost ALL in Spanish. Or sometimes Portugese. Or even Arabic. Which I don't really speak. So my brain kind of just jumbles up the words as best as it can remember. I have no idea what the songs are actually saying or what the words are. And often, my brain will substitute English words when it doesn't know what else to do. That really gets interesting. But that's another story for another day...

Homework time

One of the many daily struggles we have here is getting everyone to do their homework. Believe it or not, Caleb (10) is the only one who's very responsible in this aspect. He hates doing it but knows that the sooner it gets done, the sooner the good times begin! So he generally knocks it out almost as soon as he gets home.
Sam, 12, likes to put his off 'til about 11pm. OK, that's a little bit of an exaggeration but it's not far from the truth. He's had many nights where he's up doing homework long after Dave and I have gone to bed. I really have no idea how late he stays up but we're trying to get that under control.
Peter, ugh, his 1st grade homework is fairly easy but he just HATES having to do it. One day I practically had to nail his back end to the chair to get him to do it. I finally told him he could not leave the chair until it was done. So then this is what I found:

Yeah, this is working out well, don'tcha think? He's being VERY productive now that I've confined him to the dining room chair.

Reminds me a lot of this time.

And notice Caleb consternating over his homework. Good times.

And please do NOT notice the holes in Peter's socks. I would never, ever let my kids wear holey socks. Ever. It couldn't possibly ever happen.

Oops.

In my effort to avoid eating ALL the Girl Scout cookies that were delivered to my home yesterday, I bought these at the store today. I certainly didn't want to hear the accusation, "MOM! You ate ALL the Girl Scout cookies?!?!" So I thought I'd just buy myself my own packet of cookies and not touch the Girl Scout cookies today. I've never purchased the Pepperidge Farm Geneva cookies before but I always gaze at them longingly as I walk past them in the supermarket. I thought to myself, today is the day. I'll buy these for myself and leave all the Girl Scout cookies for the family. It was a good plan and has worked so far. Except that I already ate the ENTIRE pack of Geneva cookies. The whole thing. In one sitting . They are deceptively light and delicious! The good news is that I haven't touched the Girl Scout cookies. But it's still early...and my Geneva cookies are all gone...I'll keep ya posted.